February 6, 2004

• [#36] What A Shitty Day !

  
  

  I feel so shitty coz I've been so tired. I feel that during this week, my feelings have gone high and low and spinning like circles...yes, circles, I am running the same circle pattern over and over again, trying to change something I can't change. No wonder I'm tired! And what's more I can't help getting whoever is involved tired too. What a shitty person I am? I need a break...but what kills is that I AM on a break! Maybe having too much time is why I can't stop my bloody flooding thoughts. (You should thank me for my vagueness). Anyway, I'm gonna enjoy the break and take good care of myself from now on...oh, yes, as always.

  
  

  Then the second shitty thing was later tonight, I was called 'full of shit' by a friend...my first reaction was 'Uhh...I knew that long time ago...' Then I found out that the reason why he said that was my being too nice to someone. Right! The classical pattern: being nice is not gonna get everyone in the game happy. Now the whole world thinks I'm shitty because of something I didn't even think about at all...over a month ago!? I don't care! But hehe, it's pretty good a lesson there. BTW I was also glad my friend was being frank and didn't hide things away from me. I need that kinda friends and I'm not feeling bad for that at all.

  
  

  Then finally, just as this day hasn't been shitty enough, when I ran my butt off to catch my last train, they announced at the platform that someone just got killed by the train (just like everyday someone threw themselves under the train wheeles here in Japan) and the train was now 'being examined' and was still somewhere far, far away... Usually it's sad to hear something like that but it's Japan and people are so used to it. It was so cold on the platform and the train seemed would never come! The platform was full of station attendants just as whenever there is an accident called in. Then, finally, when we knew that the train will come in five minutes, some guy in his forties or fifties, fell off the platform in front of everybody's eyes! Well that was obviously not a suicide jump, there are just TOO many drunk people in this country standing on the station platform after midnight. That was a bad fall so all the attendants went over to help picking him upon the platform from the rails. Lucky that the train was still faraway but it was another chaos.

  
  

  When I was at last pulling away from the station on the train which has at least killed one person today, I was flashing back the past 24 hours and said to myself:: Maybe that's just one of those days! Ha!

  
  

  Well, the only delightful moment today was this morning when I read about Anerausa who had this weird dream involving some muffins and cakes and the fact that he couldn't join the league X-Man actually made him sad... People are such creatures that will always feel happy while seeing someone else miserable, aren't we? (Wicked Smiles

  
  

  Updated: To know more about DEATH, click http://www.lodger.tv/

  
  

                 To know more about LIFE, click http://www.bozzetto.com/Flash/life.swf

  
  

  Both excellent sites, great music!

  • 2:11 pm
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